The Palin Problem…

“The Palin selection is the single most dangerous event in the conscience of the Christian community in the last 10 years at least,” said Doug Phillips, president of Vision Forum, a Texas-based ministry. “The unabashed, unquestioning support of Sarah Palin and all she represents marks a fundamental departure from our historic position of family priorities — of moms being at home with young children, of moms being helpers to their husbands, the priority of being keepers of the home.”

Not one month ago on the night before the first day of school I cried my heart out to my husband and God.  Why had I chosen to work outside the home when I so desperately wanted to be home with Eli?  In that moment my heart hurt because what was best for our family was that I go back to work.  No one forced me, but I knew deep in my heart that it was the right choice.  Like so many other Christian young women I had always thought that I would be the one that got to stay home with our kids.  Though I missed teaching, I was more than willing to put it aside for a time in order that our children would be raised with a parent at home.  Over the past few years, Paul and I have learned to listen to God.  We learned the hard way, so my decision to go back to work was not made in haste.  Still, on that night before the first day of school, though I trusted completely that I had made the right choice, I mourned the loss of my precious time with Eli.

But that’s not really what I wanted to write about.  Over the past few weeks, I have stood in awe of my husband.  He is so good at running our household.  Paul strives to be good at everything he does – it’s a part of his nature.  He plays with Eli, disciplines him with love, and is so efficient.  He is very intuitive about being a keeper of our home – YET – he is still the head of our home.  He is so much the head of our home, in fact, that he has taken on the most important aspects of our home.  I am still a helper to my husband, even though I am gone a good portion of the day.  He still likes to be served desert (though he may have made it).  We work very well together as a team because we have both been in the other’s shoes. 

Why do I write this?  Well when I was reading this article I just had to disagree.  I think too many women are just happy if they leave thier kids alone with thier husband and the house is still standing when they return.  It can be a different way.  It doesn’t have to be, but it can.  I think assuming that our men can’t do this most important work is wrong.  I used to think it was my “right” to be the one who stayed home, I think many women do.

FYI – I don’t cry every night before I go to work, and yes, my relationship with Eli is different now, though it’s not diminished in any way.  And he just woke from his nap.  Bye.

4 responses to “The Palin Problem…

  1. This post has many heavy thoughts in it. In my opinion, a parent should be at home to raise small children. Mom or dad, the best fit for the job and the circumstances of for your home. Women think we can do it ALL, and it isn’t true. We need to give some of the responsibilities to our spouses. I admire you for what you are doing, it can’t be easy to let go of tasks you think are “yours.”

    As for Sarah Palin, I struggle just a bit with her choices regarding her own family. She has definitely chosen her career over her family and the price she is paying we will never know. Although, I believe that God can raise up a woman to do an important job. The very important job that she, as a vice presidential candidate has is to help get conservative voters. I am glad that Sarah Palin has a huge following, because without her, there would be no chance at all for a president with family oriented values. She was chosen for such a time as this in my opinion.

  2. I admire and respect your and Paul’s decision, too, Annie. It can’t be easy to walk a non-traditional road but your listening to God shows of us who have the privilege of peeking into your lives a light and a hope. It inspires us to listen to God when it might be diffiicult to do something less than mainstream. As are so many of the things God asks us to do. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this.

  3. Thanks guys… It wasn’t really meant to be a statement of my supporting Palin (though I do support her). Has she chosen her career over her family? We don’t really know. I don’t think it would be any different than a man with a family running for office. Her husband has made the choice to stay home so that she can pursue this. Perhaps anyone who runs for a major office such as this has to put thier career over thier family. I’m not saying it’s right, I’m just saying that her being a woman and not a man shouldn’t matter.

  4. Interesting and thought provoking post.

    I think that in part, Paul is following the the Robinson family ways. His Grandfather Robinson cooked dinner much of the time while we were growing up since his Grandma Robinson was a teacher and had homework. Plus he got home earlier than she did.

    His Dad and I shared in the kitchen chores including cooking. And his Dad is a good cook, although I think Barb did most of the cooking, but he can cook.

    And then Paul and his siblings all learned how to cook.

    I have trouble understanding some of the women at women’s retreats (or even worse a few that don’t go ) because the husband is apparently incapable of keeping the household and children going over a weekend.

    This is just so foreign to the way we were raised and I think the way Paul was raised.

    I’m glad that he is capable of doing those things and not a helpless male like some seen on some TV commercials who can’t even prepare basic things to eat!

    As far as the Palins go, I saw something in a video I think it was from several years ago that mentioned a nanny. Haven’t heard one mentioned elsewhere, but that could well be one way that she manages to do all that she does, including seeing that the children are taken care of.

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